Today I taught my coworker's mother what a dominatrix is. Not a demonstration or anything, but I had to explain it to her.

Who is the guy who won Dancing With The Stars? I don't actually watch the show, but I heard about the results and I've never heard of that guy before.

Apparently I want to gain weight. We've been out to eat five days in a row now. We had steak Friday, both Taco Bell and IHOP on Saturday, The Original Pancake House on Sunday, McDonald's Monday, and The Old Spaghetti Factory tonight. Hello, fat ass, I've been waiting for you to join me.

We had to stop at my boyfriend's office after dinner to pick something up, and we took the stairs to his floor. That should balance out the lard fest I ate over the weekend, right?