Start A War

I'm falling apart.

I can hardly breathe right now, again. I feel like I've been punched in the stomach, again.

I can't keep repeating myself when there's no one listening.

I can only have the same argument so many times.

You do what you want. Just like always, what you want comes first. You do what you want to do when you want to do it, then you're shocked to find out I'm upset.

How many times are you going to make the same empty promises to me? I've lost count. And faith.

I bear my heart and soul to you, and you try to explain to me why I'm wrong to feel what I feel.

Is it so hard? Is it so terrible to put someone else's needs before your own? It doesn't seem that way to me, but then again, I put you ahead of everything, because you are everything to me.

I just wish it was the same for you. I just wish I could be the most important thing.


Avitable said...

Aww, Amanda, I'm sorry. Being reliable and doing what he says he's going to do are traits of someone who is really committed. It's hard when someone can't even put in that basic effort.


(ass grab)

Poppy said...

Don't start a war. Realize when you're at a stalemate, and go on with your life. No matter what you do, he's not going to change. If you're not willing to stick with someone who isn't capable of putting you first then for your own happiness it's time for you to go to the next chapter of life.

Tug said...

((hugs)) to you girl. Relationships are tough. I'm single because I refuse to be my parents, fighting like you wouldn't believe in their 70's. You need to stick up for you. Weigh the pros & cons, but if YOU'RE not being treated right, or if it's not give &'s time. You're an awesome person for all that I've seen...just take care of you, and knwo that you're worth it.

Tug said...

*know* duh

Robin said...

I'm so sorry, you need to do what is best for yourself and move on from this situation. I'm here if you need to talk.

Amanda said...

Avitable- Yeah commitment's not really his thing

Poppy- I know. I'm trying to figure out whether or not I am willing.

Tug- I'm starting to stick up for myself. It's hard, yo.

Robin- I know, I know. But it's not so black or white, either. But I will let you know if I need someone to talk to, definitely