Walking Contradiction

I'm fairly self sufficient. I can change a tire, rewire a light, etc. On the other hand, I like it when doors are held for me and to be told I'm pretty. Do these ideas oppose each other?

I've been thinking about these things today after a conversation with a coworker. She suggested that I have the guys at the auto repair store install new windshield wipers, which she assured me they'd be happy to do if I played the damsel and batted my eyelashes.

This was appalling to me. I don't understand how in a society like the one we have now, someone could still hold the belief that playing the damsel is still the best way to get something done. A woman was placed in nomination to be the president of our country, and I'm still excepted to bat my eyelashes and play the helpless female to get what I want?

Then I realized the hypocrisy of my disgust. It's not like I've never used my "wiles" to get what I want. I'm not above wearing a low cut shirt and leaning on the bar a certain way to get the attention of a male bartender (or female- whatever gets me the vodka quicker). In 7th grade I didn't do one project in shop by myself. A certain guy was willing to help me out (meaning: do it all) for a smile.

But where do you draw the line? What's right, and what's wrong?

I think for me, I do what I can for myself. I can install my own windshield wipers, but I can't make my own drink at the bar. I won't rely on a man, or anyone, to something for me that I can do for myself.

This is not to say I don't enjoy a bit of chivalry. I do like to have the door held open for me, I like it when a guy buys me a drink.

I think this is what we call a double standard.

7 comments:

Willie G said...

It's only a double standard if you won't return the favor, or think it's not your place. I'll totally let you buy me a drink... cheers.

Avitable said...

You can rewire a light? That's awesome!

I don't think that's contradictory. Using what you have to get something is just smart.

If I could bat my eyelashes and get someone to do something for me, I'd do it in a heartbeat.

Robin said...

First of all, I am impressed with what you can do...I can't do ANY of that stuff.

Second, I think as a human being we have to use what we can to get what we need sometimes and we all have our own lines to draw. I also believe feminism is doing what feels right to you and not letting your sex dictate how you should live your life.

whall said...

As Chivalry goes, so goes the world.

Sarah said...

You can change a tire?

I have a hard time batting my lashes and getting what I want. But mainly because I never shut my mouth up long enough to try. Sigh.

Hilly said...

I think that sometimes people assume that a woman batting her eyes and showing her cleavage in order to get something she needs makes her weak. I think there is a TON of power in using my assets to get exactly what I want.

libragirl said...

I just had a guy here fixing my bed that the store effed up. I tried to tip him but he wouldn't take it. Just a smile was good for him...while it might be a double standard, it saved me 20$