Please, Please, Please Let Me Get What I Want

I rarely get excited about movies. Sure, there are some I actively want to see, but mostly my boyfriend pushes for them and I agree. Or it's something I see because everyone else has. Or I'm bored. But it's rare a movie comes along that I get really psyched to see.

The problem is that when I do get excited, I build things up in my head too much. I'm always convinced this is going to be the most amazing movie ever. And let's face it, rarely are movies that good. Entertaining? Sure. Thought provoking? Sometimes.

So when I saw the trailer for 500 Days Of Summer, I tried to stay calm about it. But really, Fox Searchlight (or Focus Features) movies featuring an attractive cast with a seemingly awesome soundtrack are right up my alley. I love Zooey Deschanel, and I really, really love Joseph Gordon-Levitt.

I kind of loved it. I loved that it was a (somewhat) realistic portrait of a relationship. I loved that they had fights and breakups and makeups that actually seemed like they could happen. It was a sweetly told story, with a narrator that actually didn't annoy me. I loved Joseph Gordon-Levitt's sexy karaoke scene.

It was engrossing, and well acted (of course). I recommend it if you like unrequited love stories. Because after all, as the trailer tells us, it's not a love story.

Passing The Time

I haven't done this in awhile, so here it goes: the summer movie edition (there may be a small, tiny spoiler in the Harry Potter review, but not really. It won't ruin anything, I promise)

Moon- For those of you not familiar with this one, it's about a guy (Sam Rockwell) who mans a solo mining operation on the moon, with only a Kevin Spacey voiced robot to keep him company. His three year shift is coming to an end, with only two weeks to go, when he stumbles across a body who appears to be identical to his. It makes you wonder if he's going crazy, if there's really a person who looks like him, etc.

This kind of movie is hard for me, because I'm not really a pure sci fi fan. Sure, I like sci fi if there are fancy space ships blowing up and young hot actors and actresses to watch, but pure, slow, sci fi isn't my thing. However, I think it was a good movie, even if it was very slow moving. Sam Rockwell was impeccable, there was genuine tension, and an interesting plot line. If you're a sci fi fan, I'd definitely check it out.

Harry Potter- This wasn't my favorite of the series, but it was alright. It seemed kind of long and draggy, but then again, it wasn't my favorite book of the series either. It was funny, at least. I'm not usually a purist about book to movie adaptations when the book is as long as The Half Blood Prince. But why did they cut out the battle at the end? It made the movie end in a boring, anti climactic manner. But I love pretty much anything in the HP family, so I liked it.

Bruno- Dirty, raunchy, inappropriate, and absolutely hilarious. There were a few parts that make me squeamish, and very sad for humanity. It wasn't the best movie ever, but it was funny to watch once.

These ones are older, so I'll do one sentence reviews:

Transformers- Way too long and blah.

The Hangover- So very funny and hilarious and awesome.

The Proposal- Nothing new, but I love Ryan Reynolds.

Up- Devastatingly sad, but of course awesome.

They Will See Us Waving From Such Great Heights

I'm going through a weird period of life right now. I'm having huge highs and devastating lows at regular intervals. (And no, not in the bipolar way).

For instance, at work. I had my promotion. Things with that are going well, and I've recieved a lot of postive feedback from my superiors, including fancy pants corporate people. I've made good friends with the two other people in my position, and have been spending a lot of time with them outside of work, with margaritas in hand. I even went with one as a date to a wedding. This sort of thing is hard for me, I'm just not good as socializing and making new friends, especially with girls, but I'm really making an effort here.

But at the same time, people are being fired left and right. It's getting tense. No one's doing anything wrong, per say, just the economy. We used to have 9 sales associates and now there's 3. Every time the phone rings and its work calling, I'm sure I'm being fired. I try to convince myself that I'll be one of the last fired, as I'm in a management position and I bring a little more to the table than the average employee with my background in design, which they utilize often. But that's probably just wishful thinking, there have been many people that were fired that I never saw coming.

Things in my relationship are also up and down. We're going through a lot of stuff that I don't really want to talk about, but it's rough. Basically we want different things out of life, and it's hard to find the right compromise. I honestly think we'll be okay, but again, who knows. There are no guarantees in life, especially with love. And there's so much love there, it should be able to survive this rough patch. Mostly we're okay. 90% of the time, things are perfect. It's that other 10% of the time that breaks my heart.

While we're going through this, we're planning a huge vacation. Bigger than any we've done before. I'm super psyched about it, and Lord knows I love planning things. Anything that gives me a chance to research and organize is great. I'm hoping this isn't just something to distract us from our problems though, like when people don't want to get a divorce so they have a baby instead. And I don't really think that it is, but again, I can only know my intentions, I can't read Mike's mind.

So, basically, I'm at a crossroads. I'm someone who likes to be 100% sure about things, and everything in my life right now is up in the air. It's hard for me to come to terms with the fact that I'm not in control right now.

So Easy To Please

I'm three days in to my new position, and it's going about as well as I had expected. For the most part, people are supportive. Or they don't care, which is equally fine with me. There's only one person who's being an ass about it, but she's the one I most expected to be difficult.

The real irritation about her is she truly believes she should have been offered the position based solely on seniority. During the summer, she doesn't work during the days because her kids are home from school. So she literally cannot do half of the job. They only need me to open the store and do returns. So why on earth would they have offered it to her?

Oh well. The other 12 people who work there are all fine with this, so it's all good. Mostly.

The rest of the job is fine. It's not any harder than the job I've already been doing, it's just slightly more work. I guess people had low expectations for me, or else everyone else is retarded, because they're all so impressed with how quickly I learned everything. Why yes, I can count to 15o, thank you. Yes, I can scan a receipt and press the big button that says 'return item'. I'm just a genius that way, I suppose.

The Vast Ravine, Right In Between

I was supposed to have lunch today with two friends. One I know well, and spend a lot of time with. The other was hosting the lunch at her house. I used to work with her, and we were close at the time, but I haven't talked to her much since she left about 6 months ago.

This morning my close friend called and said she couldn't come because she had to wait for the A/C repair man.

The panic began to set it.

It's not like I don't know K (the hostess). We worked together for six months, and in many ways she was like a mentor to me. She did all the visual displays in the store, and I learned a ton from her. So why was I apprehensive to spend time alone with her?

It was too late for me to cancel, I knew she had already done the shopping and preparing for lunch.

I drove over with butterflies in my stomach. I just knew it was going to be awkward. I'd have nothing to say, she'd think I'm boring, etc.

Of course, the second K opened the door, I knew it was fine. She gave me a tour of her breathtakingly beautiful home, and we sat and talked for two hours over lunch without a gap in the conversation.

It's always fine.

So why do I psych myself out? Why don't I want to have new friends?

Whenever someone wants to do something, I always have an excuse as to why I can't make it. If my boyfriend's going to be there then it's all good. It's the whole being alone with people making conversation thing I just can't seem to handle.

I need to let my fucking guard down.

Happiness is Overrated

So, I received a quasi-promotion today. It's not a big one, just a little more money and a little more responsibility (opening the store, handling returns, etc.) It's like being a half manager. It's that time of year where everyone wants to take their vacation, and they were having trouble with overlapping vacation time. Otherwise, I doubt they'd have me doing this. It's temporary, through probably October.

I just wish it was under better terms. The store manager has breast cancer and will be out of the office at least through October until she finishes chemo, radiation, and (hopefully) a lumpectomy.

I'm also worried about my coworkers. They are a jealous, competitive bunch. For example, I tend to get more hours than most of them. It's not that I'm any better than them at the job, it's mostly based on my rapport with the scheduling manager. Also, I'm 100% flexible, especially during the summer months. I can work anytime, and I'm always up for helping out if the schedule needs to be changed, and I think that's what people don't understand. If they were flexible, and didn't ask off for every weekend, I'm sure they'd get more hours. But when you're only available every third day, it's just not possible for you to get a lot of hours. You should just be glad you have a decent paying job in this economy. And yet, they bitch. They bitch to me, they bitch to each other, they bitch to the managers about how unfair this is. Well, suck it up.

So I'm concerned about how they're going to react to my "promotion." I'm sure they'll be bitching about how they've been there longer than me, and how they are better equipped to do it. It can't always be about seniority, though, right? I mean, sometimes it has to be about flexibility and being a team player. It has to do with showing up on time, and getting your job done without complaining. I'm not claiming to be the best worker ever, but at least I try. And in the end, I guess that's what counted.

The Ballad of Love and Hate

So, it's been a month since I've posted. I don't know why. It's not like I haven't had things to talk about, I just haven't been in the mood. I need to get back into the habit (or at least the weekly- habit) of posting, so I'm going to ease into it with a meme I stole from Hannah.

Also I was woken up this morning by a text super early, so I'm cranky. Here's the things I hate.

1. Most hated food. Oh man, I love most food. That's the problem. I hate sausage, or at least breakfast-type sausage and sausage on pizza. I hate cilantro. I hate Wendy's.

2. Most hated person. I wouldn't say I hate anyone, but I dislike Michelle Bachman, Sarah Palin, Dick Cheney, and Pat Robertson. (Hm, do you sense a theme?)

3. Most hated job. I've only had three jobs and they've all been good. There were many aspects of my last job I ended up hating though.

4. Most hated city. I'm sure it has good parts that I missed, but Chatanooga was a shit hole.

5. Most hated band. Nickelback, My Chemical Romance, Evanesence. Singers would be Natasha Bedingfield, Katy Perry, and Avril Lavigne (sorry Adam)

6. Most hated web site. I don't think I hate any websites. I do hate it when music or sound autoplays, though

7. Most hated TV program. I hate reality tv that follows people around (the Hills, Jon and Kate, etc.) I also hate reality dating shows. I only like shows that have people based on talent, not the ability to wear a short skirt.

8. Most hated British politician. You know, that one guy. With the hair.

9. Most hated artist. I don't like it when they take found objects and just slap it against the wall as "art". I don't mind re-purposing, but something needs to be done to it to make it art. Also the whole Dada movement was weird.

10. Most hated book.I hated The Road by Cormac McCarthy. And I hated the Scarlet Letter, and I got a B in English that semester which devastated me.

11. Most hated shop. I don't like Walmart, but I work literally next door to one and it's convenient. I kind of hate Abercrombie.

12. Most hated organization. NAMBLA

13. Most hated historical event. Umm... Slavery? the Holocaust? Any sort of mass genocide. Oh and the Spanish Inquisition.

14. Most hated sport. Hockey. Good lord.

15. Most hated piece of technology. I don't think I hate technology, that's weird.

16. Most hated annual event. I'm not a fan of summer. Summer comes every year, unfortunately.

17. Most hated daily task. Doing my hair after I shower. It takes fucking forever, and my hair's not that complicated.

18. Most hated comedian. Hands down, Dane Cook. Douche-tastic!


Now here's the love part, because I don't like all the negativity:

1. Most loved food: A really good steak, almost anything with potatoes, pizza

2. Most loved person: My boyfriend, frustrating as he may be

3. Most loved job: I love my job now, but I really loved working at Blockbuster when I was in high school.

4. Most loved city: Kansas City or Santa Monica

5. Most loved band: Death Cab, Snow Patrol, Starsailor, Editors, the National, the Decemberists, the Killers, the Shins

6. Most loved web site: Twitter?

7. Most loved TV program: Gilmore Girls, Veronica Mars, Pushing Daisies, the Mentalist, Lost, Gossip Girl

8. Most loved movie: The Princess Bride... but also The Big Lebowski, Office Space, and any John Hughes movie

9. Most loved artist: Chuck Close, easy.

10. Most loved book: The Catcher in the Rye, The Time Traveller's Wife, The Smoke Jumper, 1984, Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close, The Giver, To Kill A Mockingbird

11. Most loved shop: Target. It has everything I could ever want.

12. Most loved organization: Does the Democratic Party count?

13. Most loved historical event: The Emancipation Proclamation? That was a good moment. Also Oct. 23rd 1976, when Ryan Reynolds was born.

14. Most loved sport: To watch? Baseball. To play? None.

15. Most loved piece of technology: My i-pod

16. Most loved annual event: Fall! The sweaters, the chill in the air, holding a warm latte in the cool weather, the leaves changing colors, oh man. Only 4 months to go.